Through my sadness my heart feels much jubilation

This morning I rose early put on my glad rags and went with Sisters to the Cathedral in the center of the city for Mass. 

It was to celebrate the religious congregations that are present in Melbourne or rather Victoria. 

Arriving, Sister started to tell me who belonged to which order. Making me realize that my exposure to different religious communities is limited to some degree; still I have a wonderful gratitude that this is the case as I know where home is and didn't have to sieve through many wonderful congregations.  

We collected our booklet and taper finding a position in the cathedral. 

Looking around I was first taken by the tradition, even in the physical dress. There is a rich tradition that has been passed down from founders/foundress through many years and still is worn with pride, giving an unique sense of belonging to a particular charism. I personal am forever thankful that we have moved 'with the times' and no longer wear the habit. Not only for comfort reasons, yet what a world of difference it would make, people would define you, label and pile all their perceptions onto you just for wearing some fabric in a different way. I love the fact we are called to be among the people, be one, which is what Jesus calls us to. To work for Him yet not stand out taking on another dimension that culture places onto the clothing. It leaves more an invitation to the Lord to be from the heart rather than lip service or fear, or just something said as one might feel they have to in the present of a certain dressed individual. 

Part way through the service I again looked around and was confronted in a very physical way what I have known head wise this whole time. I struggled to find any female youth in the sea of grey and habits. I struggled even more so to identify any western younger female in the sea of beautiful gracious women and men. The physical reality hit hard to be honest. In a city that is the population of my whole country your telling me not one single girl feels the call for religious life?? How is this? What about the larger picture… let me see, in the exposure of so many different religious communities we have meet in the past eight months I have been in Australia, not yet one person has mentioned about younger females join their orders, not one in a western country or even in Australia!!!! Or what about my own country!! I have only heard of one younger women joining close community, an older women joining another community. Really, that is all… I must be misinformed or lacking awareness, surely! 

This to me is alarming, I know Im unique yet so is all of the Lords children/creation. I am struggling to come to terms with this today!

Then came time for the homily… Arch Bishop was meant to be presiding however due to illness another Bishop stepped into his place. The Bishop gave a speech that I could tear apart and let colorful counteractions to every point he made, yet I like to believe I have a little more grace than to do this. His homily was about Mercy, which brought an overwhelming sadness at the opportunity was not embraced to celebrate, acknowledge and look ahead with excitement what religious life is in the present moment and leading, or becoming. 

I listened wondering why can he not see, when a large number of religious have come together to celebrate together, why are words of encouragement not expressed. Not relating to go spread the good news, as this is embedded in each persons heart, rather words to say that their beauty, their spirit from the founder/foundress who on hearing the Lord call respond, just like each of us present, is still very much alive; so don't be dishearten that their community family 'numbers' are dropping. Express the change that is before us, not to be blind to it, rather embrace, give thanks and offer it to the Lord to use us as instruments in order to continue doing the Lord work by growing the communities. Make awareness that old language has certain images attached, times have changed as too has society and young men and women seek in different ways. Hear the cry, open the door and respond, keep looking ahead don't get trapped by notions of 'retirement' or dying communities rather see it as a chance to develop, modernize and start a new season. 

Looking around to the audience before him I wish for him to see a little of what everyone present sees, a sea of grey or rather at times no hair, the pace of movement, the physical number; take all this and pray for them, remind them of the pure grace, pure delight the Lord has for each and every person who has witnessed a lot. Pope changes, Vatican II implementation, church changes, meaning of community, meaning of been religious, living in hardship to living a slow quieter pace that might have more access to comfort. WAKE UP, take all the messages Pope Francis is giving, not only to the parish yet to their own communities, to ask guidance from their founders/foundress to bless them, guidance to bring young ones the Lord has called to give them courage and awareness of their call. Let the church build, mold the way the Lord wants and we are just His tools for this. 

What an opportunity that has been missed, that makes me realize that the larger picture is so much more than I personal can confront as I am not ready. Maybe it would make me run the other direction, would definitely highlight how much insecurity is present along with how much trust in the Lord I have or will need in moments on the journey. For me though all this fills my heart with excitement in anticipation. 

I could keep typing, the point I'm trying to make is there is a sadness present for me. A sadness in the fact that apart of me wonders if even the religious know what a gift we all have been given. To take religious life and shape it, strip away all the stereotypes, all the myths, all the structure and reveal the pure beauty of it. I am not implying forgetting our history, oh please Lord lets not forget our history, as this teaches us so much, especially those coming to the community. Been called to religious life in this special way opens the heart to witness the Lord in purity from one heart to another. Damn!! (kiwi accent here), there are many challenges before us however above this oh the beauty the magic that is awaiting for us….  that red fabric square the magician puts over the box whipping up to reveal the mystery… this is happening. Yet it can't happen by just the magician, there has to be a physical attendance, not just witnesses however participates also. 

Today, through my sadness, my heart feels so much jubilation - that I have respond to the Lords call, I am home with the Sisters. As mass concluded we exited with all the other religious and relighting our tapers we left them burning in the Lords house, holding a prayer, asking Mother Mary Joseph blessing and the Lord to guide all young hearts and especially those who are called to the cross and passion to become companions on the journey, within our congregation. So too I ask you, my beloved family, to keep in your prayers the young hearts of those discovering the Lords calling to respond to a vocation of religious life. May they be given courage, strength and a deep heart to not be fooled by appearance of religious life yet rather see the Lords grace, love and handwritten signature over their heart.