Dance of weeping

Over the past few days I have been dwelling on the shortest verse in the whole bible “Jesus wept” (John 11:35) But for all its grammatical simplicity, its packed with unfathomable complexity. 

In a moment of grieving, for all those around Him, Jesus would have known that in a few short minutes all the weeping would turn to astonishment, joy and then tearful laughter, and worship. He came from Bethany to bring these mourners the best news they could imagine. Which makes the passage on first reading a little complicated, as would Jesus not be confident, joyful calm in the storm of sorrows. Reality was, he was greatly troubled” (John 11:33) and he wept! 

One word sort of sums it up for me at this moment -  compassion! That Jesus felt for those who were suffering.  Compassion thrived in the heart of Jesus and that of his teachings. This is the virtue that most exemplifies his life. There is nothing wimpy or starry-eyed about this essential Christian virtue. Living compassionately is rarely convenient and often downright challenging. Requiring a willingness to pay the price for being aware of suffering and doing what is possible to diminish it. 

A call to compassion…. 

I recall what feels like many moons ago, when I pull into the church parking lot, pulling the keys out of the ignition and heading for the door. Been late was nothing new to me, this time, however, being late was a relief. I slip in without having to talk to people or look them in the eye. 

I remember approaching the door with a knotted stomach of anxiety. It was the first time in years attending church service after making a very public commitment of declaring my faith. Most people looked comfortable, having their prayer books in their hands, but how could I carry one when my hands were full of baggage and burdens it was all I could do in the moment put one foot in front of the other!

Everyone was standing, singing. Another relief. I slide into the back where no one could see that I did not know the words of the songs, or what to do next. I looked around at families gather together in neat composition. They knew the words. They knew what to do. They could smile and laugh, and looked from the outside as if they had the answers. 

I remember moving to a position behind a pillar, where I sank a little deeper into my seat. 

Even if I tried to blend in, I couldn’t, I felt I stood out. My eyes weary, soul longing, searching for the answers after experiencing crushing feeling like I had cut the threads. 

Where else to turn but to the Lord. I thought it would be a safe place. I knew it would be a safe place, Home! My inner sense knew that whatever was needed, I would find here. 

It has been said many times over, especially by Pope Francis that the church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints. I remember those people who surrounded me, taking me under their wing were like medical personnel, checking my vitals and starting CPR. They cared and spoon fed me and helped set what was broken and diagnose problems I didn’t even know existed. 

They didn’t do this through programs or processes. They did this through truth, love and compassion. My profession of faith that I made a few years earlier on my knees with my whole heart, was genuine. The Lord stirred in me a love for Him and I saw that love in those around me. 

By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. 

John 13: 35

By recalling this moment of deep compassion that I experienced, connects me more deeply to the meaning of ‘Jesus wept’. The riches, blessings that surround me, the love been poured over me by simply knowing who calls me is something that I want the whole world to experience. Yes there are challenges, just like Mary and Martha experienced, yet the compassion flows all around them, just like it did for the Samaritan women at the well, for Zacchaeus, Nicodemus, the leaper, to name a few plus YOU and ME. 

What would the world be without compassionate people who are willing to feel the pain of others? Who are willing to live out the teaching of loving each other as the Lord loves. Jesus weeping gives us a glimpse into how God views our suffering and death. His reasons for not sparing us these things are righteous and glorious. But in them he is full of compassion, he hates the calamity sin brings, and he himself has suffered more than we ever will ever know in order to pay the full cost of our eternal resurrection.