Listening for the thread

Today I was listening to a group of women talk… actually listening in a way that I found myself searching within for a connection, to allow my thread to weave with these. 

You see, we were talking about our week! Voices cry out with the weight of the effects of the virus.  The limitations, the statistics, the reality of what is just on the other side of our doors. It’s a scary world out there at times, the power of a virus, to call the world to halt. The deaths that it has caused – they are not numbers rather someone's loved one, mother, father, brother, sister, friend.  The larger implications on the economy, politically, mental health, vulnerable, the list goes on, all are present and up for debate. 

I sat there listening… together we are all over the globe, experiencing very different realities, while connected together. The thread of Christ shines over all other threads, the thread of love, compassion, of understanding, of unity. Then I realised there were threads of fear, uncertainty, questioning, resistants. These threads were not connecting us, while a few interweaved together, all listening with deep compassion as equals, there was a sense these were not the threads of connection. 

The expressions were focus on the darkness of sorts, the limitations, fear of what is to come, the uncertainty that wakes every morning eyes open. Talk about the weight of those who have lost their lives, the way the world has respond in a halting, pulling away and isolating. 

To me it feels a little like we have run away from the problem, distancing to a point of placing fear in people to maintain the unnatural nature of what has been imposed as a temporary solution. 

As I continue to listen, reminding myself of my inner tendance to pass judgement in questions or statements, causing a lack of confidence to speak as not want in anyway to judge. Afterwards leaving a sense of foolishness as my voice has something to say… 

Words like, fix it, leave to people in power, wait till its over to get sorted….. 

Now and again a few words sprout up – together – healing of the nature and human – mindful – interconnected – elders wisdom – each day at a time – 

I realised in these small droplets of words that my thread is interweaving only just by touch, as those words was where I was touching on the group. I have made a decision to only focus on the possibilities, light in the darkness kind of mindset. If we feed the darkness we will remain in that time, as after awhile it starts to become familiar, hard living, yet familiar all the same. If we feed into the light that creeps in – even in the darkness – then the light will get brighter a shift occurs as we grow into it – facing towards it – nature teaches this time and time again. 

This is not easy!! By any means…. Recently I have had a sore eye, so the light coming in has caused pain, physical pain. Light! Morning light that makes my soul leap for joy at what is before me, light that reminds me to stop, look up at the sky and the flowers that are opening towards the sun to bath in its goodness. Light that washes over the body gifting it nourishment. Light that instantly brings a sense of light within my movement. Setting sun that reminds me to stop and give thanks, offer up all I have and been given. 

Yet these days, blinds are closed until midday, avoidance of outside without covering up some days preventing any light from coming too near me. 

I realise that this daily living I am experiencing at this time, is no different from what the world is going through. Just the light is replaced with ‘new’, it’s the possibilities that are been created now in this moment. It’s the letting going of control, of the uncertainty that so many people have either not confronted as been “too busy” or just realise when all ‘normal’ is taken then the unfamiliar ground they stand on is a little uncomfortable. 

There is no need to wait for this virus to pass thru before change, before seeking or nourishing the new. Even if you can’t name the new, living into it, allowing openness for the seed to plant roots. There is no need to feel you have to ‘fix it’ other than possibly change the mindset around fixing. If this approach is taken then sadly all that is done is not fostering new rather just creating a band aid effect that helps no one, not even yourself. 

Its time to stop looking to the ‘people in power’ as we are all connected, from the dirt you stand upon, the feathers that you lay your head upon, the rubber on your shoes, the water you share with your neighbours, the love you receive from the Lord. We are all connected in a way that is so strong yet so vulnerable. Power is in the people, those in politics are given that right by the people who voted them in. Power in numbers! Its time as a human body we act, we take a stand not for the structural systems that are in place that served a world ‘norm’ as before, as its proven or rather become so clear this doesn’t work. Its time that action speaks, not policy, not economic benefit or distancing. Its time to be one body. 

For me, its time to embrace the gift of now, the gift that has come to all of us. To look around us and see those small seeds – look for them – do you see them? Hear them? 

While for this moment I continue to live in what some days feels like physical darkness I hold fast and firm that brightness is on the horizon. I am creating my own horizon that is at touching point. May I have the Lords grace, strength and lean on Him in those moments when I sense my foolishness to stay silent opposed to offer difference, newness and speak of the now, of the light. May we all find comfort in stopping in the present moment, to pause and listen – listen to Mother Earth, listen to your own heart, listen to the words that float around you – LISTEN -